First big boy birthday party

All names have been changed to protect the children... my friends are very amusing to me.

___________ the invite ___________

Yo Whores!

My son Tom the puff boy (almost back to normal now from "the incident") has specifically requested your presence for his 4th BDay bash. Sorry I am not sending cute Spiderman invites but Ann's wedding and camping weekend took all my planning strentgh. SO, Sunday 4pm (yeah I know, this coming weekend). We have some slip and slide competition planned, wet t-shirt contest, bocce etc... Please let me know if you are coming so I know how much crap to get.

Can anyone fwd this to Matt's wife 'cause little Cooper has to be there too. Let me know of one of you has her email.

Peace out

Kate

---------- my response ----------

Hi Kate-

Thanks for inviting the family! We'll be there, and Matt is looking
forward to modeling his pecs for the wet teeshirt contest.

See you soon.

-Leigh

____ another response after recalling how Kate told me she hates goody bags _____

Also, Kate, if you could please make sure to fill us a goody bag of useless
plastic crap, especially if it includes some sugary foods and black
permanent markers, that'd be great.

:)

-Leigh

_____________ another friend's response __________

wait, Cooper doesn't get the chocolate-covered espresso beans?

------------- final response from Kate -----------

Great! Tom will be thrilled to have "little Cooper" over! I will make sure to also include sharp objects in the bag (I hate these...better to spend money on beer for the adults).

Kate

Grant's recent triumphs

Grant is hellbent on learning to crawl, and just mastered sitting up on Saturday. He still topples periodically, but for the most part he can sit on a blanket for a minute or two, and sometimes longer, and play with toys. It is so fun to watch him- I had forgotten how adorable they are when they first learn to sit.

In terms of crawling, let's just say you can tell he's been working hard because he has rug-burn. The kid is squirming, pushing, kicking, flailing, spinning, tucking knees under himself, getting up on his arms, rocking back and forth, and generally training for what appears to be his upcoming crawling marathon. He's going to get it all together soon, I think. He just figured out in the last day how to get into a good crawl position and maintain it, and of course within hours of that advance he had added back and forth rocking to the list of skills. When he gets really mad, he tries everything at once and usually ends up scooting himself either in a 360 pivot on his belly, or straight backwards and under some piece of furniture, or both.

Of course, being Mr. Even Tempered, he does all this with a smile. Even when he's mad. He'll grunt and grumble and then look up and smile as if to say, "Hard work is so FUN!"

My snappy comeback

I'm pretty much incapable of snappy or witty comebacks to rude comments. I'm not fast enough, and I tend to take things personally.

You can therefore imagine how incredibly proud of myself I am for what I said today. Here's the scenario; Cooper was hungry and overwhelmed, and pitching an impressive 2 year old's tantrum in the middle of a very busy and hot farmer's market. It was a classic toddler moment- the kid was just unable to cope with the stimulation, crowds, heat, etc and so he just lost it. Of course he took it out on the best target available (me). He's screaming "MY MOMMY," "UP!" and "HUG!" at the top of his lungs (these are the three things he repeats when he's miserable and really, really wants my attention), clawing at my side and legs, and trying to keep me from walking by running full force into my legs from in front. I'm somehow moving forward in the crowded market, pushing Grant in the stroller, trying to get into the calm dark parking area to help Cooper get himself together, and super grateful that my friend was with me to carry my veggies. And this older woman, perhaps 60, stops right in front of me and asks in an accusatory manner, "Well? Are you his mommy?"

And I looked at her like she was out of her mind, and said the first thing that came into my head as my poor overwhelmed little boy ran headfirst, again, into my legs and wrapped both arms around my thighs, and let out a big wail of frustration.

"CLEARLY!"

And then I walked pointedly past her while Cooper clung to my right leg like a rabid monkey, screaming. Incidentally, it is very hard to push a stroller while dragging a nearly 30lb kid on your shin.

A few minutes later, after Cooper had finally taken a few deep breaths in the parking garage and drank some cold water, and he even was able to say "Cooper frustrated Cooper want to go home," my friend said something like, "Good comeback to that woman. I can't believe she said that to you!"

Me neither. Had she never seen a tantrum before? Seriously.

Poor little kid

Grant has been all "off" because he's got both upper front teeth coming in at once. His sleep is all weird (which is to say he's acting more like a normal infant), he bites everything (he almost drew blood on my wrist yesterday) and his spastic nursing is really frustrating to both of us.

This afternoon I did something I've never done before- I gave my own kid a bottle. And he drank it. Of course I have something like 200oz of stored milk in the freezer, so it isn't like this was a sacrifice on my part, but still, I'm sort of shocked. Right now he's busily chewing his hand raw while clutching a clean cloth diaper, bouncing in his bouncer, and loudly hiccuping. Poor little dear seems to do best when he's very, very distracted. I hope those teeth come through soon.

Oh, and yes, we've been giving him ample ibuprofen. It only helps at night, somehow. During the day it doesn't seem to make him any happier.

Matt made me do it

I wasn't gonna write this, but Matt says I have to.

Yesterday after using the potty, Cooper was looking into the bowl to admire his handiwork. In the bowl was a very large item, and one very small one. He exclaimed proudly, "Cooper pooped a mommy poop with a baby poop!"

I laughed. Certainly, they had a family resemblance going for them. Although honestly, they both looked like shit.

Out of the mouths of toddlers

For better or for worse, he'll say anything, and he's very descriptive.

"Cooper pooped big brown bunches of poop in the potty! YAY! Cooper dump big poop out in big boy terlet. And flush!"

"Cooper no touch doggy's big fuzzy penis. No. Not ho-'kay. Cooper ho-'kay touch doggy's fuzzy butt."

And my favorite, while we were getting ice cream downtown last night in the summer heat... "HEY MOMMY!" "Yes, Cooper?" "I FART. LOUD!"

Welcome to grammar

Cooper has miraculously started to use all sorts of grammatical structures. It is very funny to hear in his squeaky little voice things like, "I want milk in a cup!" or "Where is my shoe?"

Of course, he doesn't always get it right. But it so amazing to me that these things are so sneaky and sudden. Just last week the same things would have been, "My milk cup!" or "Shoe where?" and now- Poof!- we have full grammar and use of all the different parts of speech.

Also, Grant is almost able to sit up unassisted. So cool! He's pretty proud of himself. I'm very happy for him, too. Sitting up makes it so much more fun to hold toys.